Can two people ever really be JUST FRIENDS after being in a relationship?
Let’s explore the basic types of break-ups:
- Harsh break-up: This probably happened because something big and huge went down. For Example, cheating, fighting, or actions.
- “no more feelings” break-up: One side just doesn’t have the feelings anymore and needs to see other people. It should only be hard to be “just friends” for the other side.
- Casual “let’s just be friends” break-up: somehow you both decide to be friends.
I’m going to be focusing on the last one.
When you share something as close as a relationship how do you know how to act around them after breaking up? You will still want to walk up to them in a crowd and grab their hand, kiss their cheek, wrap your arms around them, etc. Dating someone breaks down any and all boundaries that two people have. I definitely wouldn’t go up to my best friend and kiss him or hold his hand because those are friend boundaries.
After your first kiss there is no boundary line. You kiss all the time.
After you have sex there is no boundary line. You can’t go back to just kissing, just holding hands, and DEFINITELY just being friends. You will always have that sexual connection.
So how can you see the person you just dissolved boundary lines with and not have the urge to be more than just friends? It’s definitely tough because you are so used to having no boundaries that you can’t get used to not kissing someone hello/goodbye. When both sides are having a hard time with building the boundary walls back up its easy to slip up. You could be testing the “just friends” relationship by hanging out be totally cool and one person makes a move. You now have to start all over. Like an earthquake came rolling through ruining all your construction. If you want to be just friends it would just be easier to not start dating at all.
To date or not to date, that should be the question.
So Cal love,
California Girl ❤
We all have girlfriends. The ones that have your back no matter what. The ones that understand what you’re going through. The ones that can finish your sentences. Yeah, I have a few too and honestly I have no idea where I would be without them.
One of my best girlfriends is Kaitlin. I call her my sister because we are so close we might as well be sisters. Everyone that knows me, knows her and vise versa. We are pretty much a package deal. 2 for 1 and everyone knows that if you invite one, you invite both. If one of us doesn’t show up to an event where our friends are there the other is always asked “Where is your sister?.”
We even go through the same problems almost always at the same time. Talk about cycles being crossed! 😛 Like the past month with my break up…she had just found this incredible guy, who she thought was someone she could spend a long time with if not the rest of her life. What does the douche bag do? Yep! Exactly the same thing the B did to me. Dropped her like she was made of plush. NEWS FLASH BOYS! Girls are not made of plush fuzzy goodness. We’re made of glass! At least in our teen years. Dudes! I mean seriously? How do you just stop talking to someone? I don’t think I have ever picked up my phone, saw who the text was from and thought to myself “hmm, I don’t really like them anymore so I’m just not going to text back” or “I’m scared to get close to him because he might be like the last guy and break my heart, so I will just not text back.” It just doesn’t work like that!
Sorry, went off on a tangent there. I guess there’s still some hard feelings. =]
Anyways, girlfriends always know just what to do to make you feel better.
I would do anything in the world for mine. I’ll be there for them through thick n thin, douche bags n lovers, plushy goodness n glass. No matter the case and I know they will be there for me.
Keep your friends close, your enemies closer, and your girlfriends like family.
So Cal Love,
California Girl ❤